Thursday, May 05, 2005

Convention Bingo

A quick check of the trusty wall calendar and we see that the Nationals are but a few weeks hence.

To enhance the enjoyment of your convention-going we submit the following game we devised to help pass the time at past gatherings, when we had already had our fill of ambitious card routines and zombies and were wandering the halls/dealer rooms in an attempt to amuse ourselves.
All you need is a small, pocket-sized notebook and a pen or pencil. Simply keep a tally based on the point assignments below and then compare your results with those of others who are also playing along.

Collect points based on witnessing the individual, situation, circumstance, affliction, etc. as follows:

-Hotel registration paid with a money order - 2 pts.

-Registrant arriving with clothes packed in grocery bags - 2 pts

-Hotel bellman with an attitude because he had been stiffed - 1 pt.

-Adult wearing a fedora - 2 pts.

-Child under the age of 18 wearing a fedora - 5 pts.

-Anyone carrying a ferret - 2 pts.

-Noticeably poor personal hygiene - 2 pts.

-Attendee on parole/probation - 5 pts.

-Dressed entirely in black - 1 pt.

-Cell phone ringing during the close-up show - 2 pts.
-If it’s the close-up performer’s - 10 pts.
-If he takes the call - 20 pts.

-Carrying a magazine with their picture on the cover - 5 pts.

-Any non-performer wearing a tux shirt - 2 pts.

-Selling his lecture notes in the lobby and not a performer/lecturer/dealer - 2 pts.

-Stage competition act using a card table - 1 pt.

-Non-registered dealer selling wares out of his hotel room/car/elevator - 5 pts.

-Wearing top hat and tails around the hotel - 10 pts.

-Waitress with an attitude because she was stiffed - 2 pts.

-Dealer selling Calcutta knock-off of a Collectors’ Workshop prop - 1 pt.

-Anyone sleeping during a lecture - 1 pt.

-Anyone sleeping during the professional close-up show - 2 pts.

-Anyone sleeping in the hotel lobby because they didn’t get a room - 1 pt.

-Bringing a bag of McDonalds’ to the evening show - 2 pts.

-Secretly recording the lecture - 2 pts.

-Shoplifting in the dealer room - 2 pts.

-Dealer room security guard accidentally shoots his own finger off - 5 pts.

-Violations of local fire code in the hotel - 1 pt.

-Violations of health code in hotel restaurant - 1 pt.

-No-show of the convention honoree - 2 pts.

-No-show of the closing show headliner - 1 pt.

-Juggler in the evening stage show - 1 pt.

-Local high school marching band in the evening stage show - 10 pts.

-Dealer selling standard utility items made from precious metals - 2 pts.

-Well known children’s performer shouting obscenities - 5 pts.

Door to close-up show room slammed more than ten times during the performance - 1 pt.

-David Blaine trying to crash the convention and being thrown out - 1 pt.

-ANY convention organizing staff seen sober and outside their hotel room - 20 pts.